
One of the best things about having kids that the books don’t tell you about is it gives you a chance to relive your own childhood without feeling the slightest bit guilty or self indulgent. I’ve used my daughter as an excuse to buy DVDs of The Clangers, Bagpuss, and Camberwick Green which thankfully she liked (though not as much as me!) and were a nice reminder that children’s television shows once had the laid-back tone of a kindly uncle instead of being your “cool” best friend who is shouting at you all the time.
I’ve also indoctrinated introduced her to old film favourites like Mary Poppins and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang which were as much a part of my childhood as jam sandwiches and grazed knees as I imagine they were for most people my age. Happily, not only have these two stood the test of time but I think I’m more impressed with them now than I was as a kid because I can appreciate what truly top-class productions they are, the songs especially are as good as any you’d hear in a Broadway show and are probably better than they needed to be for a mere “kids film”.
Mary Poppins needs to be bloody good too because it has to withstand the infamous horror that is Dick Van Dyke’s cockney accent which sounds like an Australian chewing a golf ball and makes it hard to listen to great songs like “Chim Chim Cher-ee” without cringing. Luckily everything else in the film is perfect especially Julie Andrews who rightfully won an Oscar for it and, I probably shouldn’t admit, there are times when I think she looks quite, well, sexy in it, especially in that orange coat and white shoes. I think I’m just suffering from an Englishman’s pervy attraction to prim and stern nanny types. Spit spot!
Download: Chim Chim Cher-ee – Dick Van Dyke and Julie Andrews (mp3)
Download: Feed The Birds (Tuppence A Bag) – Julie Andrews (mp3)
I remember being taken to see Chitty Chitty Bang Bang when it came out in 1968 and I used to have a Corgi toy model of the car which is probably worth a mint today. Though the film was partly an attempt to copy the success of Mary Poppins (Dick Van Dyke is in it, Julie Andrews was offered the female lead and the songs are by the same composers) it’s still terrific with lots to enjoy (though The Childcatcher scares the crap out of my daughter) and thankfully Van Dyke didn’t attempt an accent this time for which the people of England are eternally grateful. If he had done this lovely, lovely song might be known as “‘ushaboye Moun’ayn” which, gor blimey guv’nor, would ‘ave bin a bloomin’ tragedy.
Download: Hushabye Mountain – Dick Van Dyke (mp3)
As any parent will tell you, 99% of kids movies and tv shows these days are rubbish which seem to exist just to sell toys and Happy Meals and the only modern studio that puts in the same kind of care, effort and skill that went into Mary Poppins is Pixar who never insult the intelligence of kids or their parents, so thank God for them. Everyone else seems to think all you need are some breakdancing cats and a few poop jokes to keep the nippers happy — they’re not wrong, kids will watch any old rubbish if you’re not careful, they have terrible taste.